The weekend was weird. Heard some stuff that I knew was coming but wasn't ready for. I knew it was coming, and I tried as hard as myself to tell myself that it wasn't going to happen but it did.
It made me incredibly sad.
I worked all weekend which didn't help matters. I worked in the office alone on Saturday, with no A/C and a bunch of music. It didn't help me get my mind offf of things. I had way to much time to think and it was breaking me apart. Same goes for Sunday. Work with too much time to think.
On Saturday night Liverpool Jannine took me out to see Charlie and the Chocolate factory. My confession is that I didn't see the first one. I saw bits and pieces but not the whole thing. But this one was fine with me. Creepy, weird, but good. Burton and Depp have always been a cool combination. I enjoyed it.
Besides that, the rest of the weekend was pretty suckie. Shit really.
I fucked up and smoked a cigarette on Friday and then again last night. I need to stop this now before I do it again. They tasted like shit both times and made me feel horrible. I don't want that anymore. I had a moment of drunken weakness both times and I felt like I completly betrayed myself. I'm not continuing the smoking. Can't.

I am not the happiest person right now. I am not a complete mess either. Just have to sort through some emotions and such. Always a battle that I fight alone. but I guess thats the way it was meant to be.